In this blog, I have written about meeting people when traveling (see here and here). I have also written about a trip to Norway and
making my dad jump off a train (stationary, not moving!) here. I wrote about
amazing friends hosting me in other countries (see this post). But today I want
to write about when you are a host to a foreign guest; when your land is
strange and new to someone.
About a year ago, I played host to friends from Norway (I
did mention this a bit in this post). My friend, Mariann, is from Norway
and we met over 20 years ago when she was studying in the U.S. We stayed in
touch all these years and when my father and I planned our big trip to Norway,
she and her family were a huge reason the trip was so amazing. (You can read all
about it - not just the train part - in this post). One of the wonderful people we met on that trip was
Mariann’s father, John. A big bear of a man, John could talk about anything. He
was more in tune with U.S. politics and current events than most people in the
U.S. are. He had a great sense of humor and a penchant for debate.
Unfortunately, in July of 2012, John passed away. I got the
email from Mariann and could just feel her sadness through her written words.
But what could I do? I couldn’t go sit with her, or listen to her, or even
attend the funeral. I sent a card, but that wasn’t enough. When John was first
starting his career after graduate school in New York City – and when Mariann
was a baby – he became a professor at the University of Texas in Austin. He,
his pregnant wife, and baby daughter moved to Austin and lived there for a few
years. Since I was in Austin at the time of his passing, I thought I would
contact the university and see if they had a way for us to plant a tree or
something in his memory. That is how I found out about UT Remembers Day.
UT Remembers is a special day the university plans for the
loved ones of those who have died in the previous year. They have a whole day
of events, including a special ceremony. I found out they send invitations, so
I asked them to send one to my friend and to her mother in Norway. I just
thought they would like that John’s name would be on the list for the ceremony.
But instead, when they got the invitation, they were moved to tears and
Mariann’s mother and sister planned to come and participate in the UT Remembers
day! I was shocked, but so happy. And so excited to help them make their plans.
A few short weeks later, the three of them showed up: mother
(Jorunn), sister (Pernille), and sister’s 10-year-old son (John Gudbrand). I was so
excited to be hosting them. I introduced them to Texas BBQ (even though I am
vegetarian!) – which they said was their favorite meal, and also had them try
breakfast tacos, which they initially thought sounded strange. I took them out to Lake Travis where they had lived for a
while, and we ended up at a neighborhood picnic with some of the neighbors from
way back then. We went to the church where Pernille was baptized. We went to
hear live music at Gruene Hall. But most importantly, we went to UT Remembers
Day.
It was a beautiful day. It started off rather cold, but
luckily got warmer because the Norwegians had only brought clothes for Texas
warmth. The sun was shining, but not burning. And the family enjoyed and
appreciated every part of what had been planned by the university. My father
and I went with them to the ceremony in the Tower Garden in the afternoon. It
was perfect, not too long, bagpipe procession, touching readings, lovely music,
and the reading of the names and the tolling of the Tower Bell. It was moving
and full of class. Really well done.
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| Here are my friends, including John, back in the day, on Lake Travis. |
After the ceremony, a professor who had worked with John
came over to talk to Pernille and Jorunn. I know they loved that, and the
professor even had some papers John had worked on during his time there. And on
that day in Norway, Mariann and the rest of the family flew the U.S. flag at half-mast.
It was all just very nice and lovely.
But it was more than the ceremony for them. It was seeing
this place they hadn’t seen for over 40 years. It was stepping back in time and
remembering all the wonderful things that happened when they lived there. It
was remembering how much John loved the U.S. and Texas and how his daughter who
was born there still felt that sense of pride, even from so far away. She
finally had a chance to connect with this place, a place that meant so much to
her father, and that still meant so much to her mother on this trip. Her mother
felt all these things came together perfectly for the trip, and it made it easy
and special to honor and remember her husband.
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| Texas BBQ ... awww yeah! |
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| Visitors from Norway and me at UT. |
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| John Gudbrand and me up in the UT Tower. |
There are some trips that are a break from the chaos of
everyday life, and a chance to escape from the “normal.” There are some where
the focus is architecture, art, or history. There are some that
are about gastronomic pleasures and wine tasting. But there are a few that go
beyond all that. The trip I took to Norway with my dad was very special, on so many
levels. So playing host to my friend’s family was an honor really, and a
complete pleasure. We had so much fun and I loved being the conduit to
revisiting some special places. If I ever again have the opportunity to help
someone make a special trip to where I am living, I will jump on it. After all
the hospitality I have received abroad and in the U.S., it is only right that I
pay it forward somehow, some way. If you have encountered similar assistance
while traveling, consider doing the same for someone when you are home. It is
almost as great as – if not better than – taking a trip yourself.
